Did We Go Too Far, Boys?
by smileyfacebabe
Summary: No, I don't think so. Itachi might disagree, but then again he's too busy molesting Sakura in her time of need. Maybe we'll ask him later. Or maybe we'll just run for our lives. That sounds good too.  ItaSaku; AU


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or Castle. Although I love all three. LEGIT.  
**A/N:** Really, why do I _do_ these things to myself? Castle season 1 is SO much scarier and tense than Castle season 3! I'm _dying_, I swear. D": (But, dude, I am so watching more tomorrow. Murder mysteries, man; they're addicting.)

* * *

"Itachi," Sakura hissed, positively shaking under the mammoth comforter she was curled beneath. "Itachi, where _are_ you?"

Itachi gave the bedspread Sakura was hiding under a dry, slightly annoyed look before rolling his eyes irritably. He had half a mind not to answer and let her continue on down the path of paranoia she was stuck on but he knew better than that.

His mother would kill him when she found out. Now, if it had been a matter of "if she found out" he wouldn't gladly have taken the risk, if only because Sakura had brought this upon herself completely. But it was not a matter of "if she found it", because Mikoto had the creepy mother sense to know _everything_, especially the things one really, really didn't want her to know.

It was highly annoying. And the main reason he had never been able to sneak cookies from the kitchen as a child.

"ITACHI, OMIGOD, ARE YOU WHERE? _ITACHI-_"

"I'm over here, Sakura," Itachi muttered, watching with mild satisfaction as the bundle of bedding jumped nearly a foot high. "Or at least, I'm pretty sure that's what you just asked. Might want to rearrange some words in the future, though, or I might not understand what you're shrieking, er, _asking_."

Two big frightened green eyes appeared from the middle of bedding mountain, peering at Itachi shakily like they expected him to disappear or transform in front of them. When nothing happened, save for Itachi raising a questioning eyebrow at her, Sakura's entire head appeared from the blankets. Sighing Sakura glanced around, taking in the details of the room slowly, and Itachi was hit with the image of a child afraid of the monsters in the closet, begging their parent to get rid of the bad, scary things in there.

Now if only his situation was so easily fixed, as was the child and the closet. Oh, the age of nightlights and simple solutions.

"Sakura, why do you do this to yourself," Itachi moaned, dropping his head into his hands so he could pretend not to notice when the girl jumped at the sound of his voice. "I mean, wasn't it enough to watch that Buffy episode that you hate yesterday; why'd you have to go watch Castle all day if it freaks you out so much?"

"Because Castle's the _shit_, Itachi," Sakura hissed, scandalized that the taller, raven haired male would even begin to suggest watching Castle was a bad idea. "And because it sounded like a good idea at the time!"

"Babe, everything sounds like a good idea at the time. Now tell me; did it ever cross your mind that you wouldn't be able to sleep tonight, at any point in that time frame of yours?"

Silence met Itachi's tired drawl and he was half tempted to let his head drop straight to the desk. At least then the slight throbbing in his head would have a physical cause that he could hate without feeling guilty. Actually, Sakura's ability to make him feel guilty when he hadn't _done_ anything was one of the reasons he refused to look at her right then.

"I didn't think so," He concluded, sighing softly through his nose and letting his shoulders sag dangerously. "And now it's up to me to chase the bad things away, huh?"

He felt more than saw Sakura perk up at that, knew the way she would straight as the light shown in her eyes again. She'd beam at him, even if he wouldn't look at her, and the comforter would drop from her shoulders; Itachi would protect her now so she didn't need to soft, warm hide-away anymore. She was nearly nineteen, she shouldn't be _doing_ this to him...

Unfortunately for Sakura, what Itachi didn't expect to happen happened. Just as she perked up, dropping the blanket from her shoulders and relaxing, a shriek like that of a banshee sounded from the window as something crashed into it. Both heads whipped around to look, Sakura was already panicking and halfway to a heart attack at that point but the scene at the window easily sent her over the edge. She screamed, tossing herself backward off the bed, landing in a terrified mass of limbs and pillows on the ground just before she scrambled up and shot into Itachi's arms as fast as her legs would carry her. Itachi, for his part, managed to only choke on his breath and stare, uncomprehendingly, at the window before grunting lightly as Sakura's entire body weight slammed into his chest and sent his computer chair toppling over.

From outside the window Deidara, Hidan, Kisame, and Sasori all exchanged high fives- or, Kisame and Deidara did, since Hidan and Sasori's arms were tied- and laughed. Deidara pulled off his disturbing skeleton mask and howled with laughter, his fake knife covered in fake blood lying innocently on the ground next to his buckled knees. Hidan and Sasori leant against each other, their hands tied up in their overly large straightjackets, their own masks for their tossed together costumes pushed to the side of their head thanks to Kisame. Kisame himself leant against the wall, admiring their work through the window as Itachi struggled to get Sakura off of him, with his own creepy blue smiling mask in his hand, a scalpel in the other. After a minute of watching Sakura shake and shiver in sudden adrenaline aided fear Kisame tilted his head at his companions and asked the question that needed to be said, but was dreaded all the same.

"Think we went too far, boys?"

From inside the room Itachi lolled his head to the side, glaring at his friends through his bedroom window. Obviously, there would be hell to pay later. Was it worth it, though; that was the Big Question.

"Nah, I think it'll be fine; Saki's a big girl, she can take a little prank," Sasori snickered, not at all bothered by the lack of arm use he was suffering. "Sides, she was practically asking for it!"

"A-fuckin'-men," Hidan agreed, teetering dangerously as he struggled to get out of his straightjacket.

Deidara simply smiled, flipping his dear friend Itachi the bird before making over-exaggerated kissing motions towards the pinkette curled on his chest. In response Itachi merely narrowed his eyes for a long moment before smiling, slowly and cruelly. That smile alone quieted the boys outside his window and they await with curious, ever-turning minds for the statement that could either miss of hit their dooms.

"Very nicely done," Itachi said loudly, still smiling his cruel little smile at the window. "So nicely done I think I'll just tell Mother about your little game; I'm sure she'll find it _very_ amusing too. Especially when she hears about how it affected Sakura, her one of her _favorites_, might I add…"

Though it wasn't a very manly move, Itachi knew the ends would justify the means. He enjoyed, above all, how his friends' faces paled quickly before they all started to scramble and shove to get away from the window A.S.A.P. even though it would do them no good. Mikoto would hunt them down if they ran and if they _did_ make her go to the effort of finding them their pain would only be doubled, maybe tripled.

And besides, Itachi thought as he wrapped his arms around the wide eyed, gasping girl whose trembling body was pressed so intimately to every inch of his own, Sakura really did have it coming.


End file.
